


Monster Stuck In Your Head

by Myworldofgayfanfiction



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Excercise, F/F, F/M, M/M, Panic Attacks, Self Confidence Issues, Self Harm, m/m - Freeform, self doubt, self hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-12
Packaged: 2019-05-05 21:39:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14627562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Myworldofgayfanfiction/pseuds/Myworldofgayfanfiction
Summary: Bucky Barnes always had self doubt issues, but he took it to far this time.





	Monster Stuck In Your Head

Worthless. 

“So Bucky your opinions?” 

Usless. 

“Bucky? Hellooo? You with me?” 

Talentless. 

“Bucky? Bucky! Ugh come on man! Do you hear me?!” 

Pathetic

“Bucky? Shit, someone go get Steve!” 

Weak

“Shit, Steve! Babe you okay?!” 

Selfish. 

“Babe, it’s me Steve! Babe come back to us please!” 

Not Worth It. 

“Oh my fucking god, everyone shut the hell up!” 

Not Worth Space. 

“Okay listen, Call Tony!” 

Not Worth Him. 

“What do you mean he is not available?!” 

Not Worth Breath. 

“Not worth it!” Bucky screamed out as his vision slowly came back. He saw Steve crouched in front of him and imbetween his legs, as he was sitting down. Everyone else in the room were looking at- 

The wet patch that was on his sweatpants and around his crotch. 

Bucky had successfully wet himself in front of the whole of the Avengers. 

Fuck. 

Tears started to swell up in his eyes, but he tried to hide them. Steve obviously saw them. 

“Hay, Hay it’s okay. You safe. Your back and safe.” Steve took Buckys hand in his and held it. Bucky looked down at his boyfriends worried blue eyes and tears started to fall completely. 

Then, Bucky bolted. 

 

* 

 

Bucky couldn’t leave his room for the rest of that day. He cleaned himself off in his bathroom that connected to his bedroom and didn’t leave. Until 6 o’clock came and Bucky started to get hungry. 

Now, Bucky did try to push down his hunger like he did when Hydra Got him, but that was harder now, as he knew he could eat and that it was okay to eat now. He kept telling his body that it was thirst and not hunger but really, he knew it was really hunger as his stomach started to make weird noises. 

So Bucky decided that he couldn’t starve himself to death and got up, quickly went to the kitchen and got food. Sounds easy right? Well apparently the very person he didn’t want to see was right in the kitchen, as if he was waiting for Bucky for the past 4 hours, was Steve fucking Rogers. 

“Bucky.” Steve said firmly as Bucky walked in whilst keeping his head low which made his long hair cover his eyes. Thank god for that. Bucky chose to ignore him, as if his boyfriend wasn’t even in the same room as him. 

“Bucky!” Steve said after a few seconds, more anger than firm now in his voice, which sent shivers down Buckys spin. How pathetic. 

“What?!” Bucky snapped his head up, only to meet Steve’s pleading eyes. “Here to mock me about what happened earlier?! Here to hear an explanation about it?! Well I’m sorry but maybe another time, okay?!” Bucky finished his little snap and turned back to the cabinets and looked for something, anything. 

“Bucky, I.. I just want to help you okay? And if you don’t talk then I can’t do that now can I?! Just please tell me what happened in that office room and I will leave it!” Steve said, stepping closer to the Metal Armed Soldier. 

“It was..” Bucky grabbed a cereal bar and looked back at Steve, debating whether to tell him or not. He went with not “It was nothing, Just drop it” 

This time, Bucky left quietly and angrily to his room. 

 

* 

 

Steve watched his boyfriend leave. That son of a bitch just wanted to ruin his life, didn’t he? 

In all honesty, Steve was worried and upset at Bucky. They hadn’t been fighting or they rarely ever did fight at all and when they did, it was full of teases and drunken kisses. It was just that Bucky was acting strange. And when Steve Fucking Rogers thinks Bucky is being weird, there is a problem. Bucky had been distancing himself a lot more from him and the others. Which Steve got the others as he sometimes needed time alone without them but without Steve? That was just another level of crazy and unbelievable. Bucky was always with Steve and Steve was always with Bucky. It was a fact in the Tower. So why was Bucky being so distant from him? Was it something he said? Something he did? Did Bucky ‘want a break’ forever? Was Bucky okay?- 

Steve ran to Buckys room quickly and knocked on the door, he had to get away from those thoughts. And the only way to do that was to clear them completely. 

Bucky was going to talk. Even if he didn’t want to. He had to. For his sake and Steve’s sanity. 

 

 


End file.
